So I am back, and once again you can all thank wonderful Clara for sharing the video that inspired me to write this blog post 🙂 The video is made by Kaylee Commons and you should def watch it. Love it when people get into important subjects like these!
For starters, I do hate these articles or whatever we should call them, online, in women’s magazines, etc. that give the opinion of what men think of women’s clothing. Blargh. Couldn’t care less. And the thing I hate even more than these articles/advice/crap even existing is the fact that I READ THEM. Why??? Because I want to know what men think about how women dress? Do I really? NO.
You know, lately I have been thinking a lot about what we are taught as women growing up how to behave and how to dress. I remember trying to fit in during junior high and high school, wearing the ”right” things and trying to be like everybody else. During an orientation with the Young Women’s Empowerment Zone last year we had a group exercise where we got to explain to the other women about our 13-year-old selves, what we dressed like, what we thought about, the music we listened to and so on. We also got to write advice to ourselves at that time.
My 13-year-old self wore jeans and a sweater most of the time. I also had glasses and was really afraid not to fit in. One of the other girls at the Zone (who went to my high school) told a completely different story, where she had worn short skirts and low cut tops, embracing her own and new sexuality, feeling good about herself.
At that moment, I envied her because the advice I had given myself was “these people are mostly stupid, you will not be in touch with them in ten years and they do not matter” and I so wished that I would have been able to step out of my shell at that time and dye my hair purple, wear ripped jeans, or whatever I wanted at the time. I’m not sure what I would have wanted to do, but I just wish I would have gone bananas with it!
And I didn’t dare because of what I thought other people would think of me.
Back to the video, there are so many things that other people (men AND women) think of other people’s clothing, and it’s just stupid to collect random sayings of some jerks in order to make others feel bad about it and their looks in general. JC, as if many women don’t feel bad about their looks as it is! And as if men would be appropriate to give us advice on how we look. I’m sorry, but you don’t know what you’re talking about. The need for men’s approval in all kinds of situations is something we should erase from your mind. All you need is you and your approval. And maybe sometimes your awesome and supportive friends´ support (be they men or women).
Just wear whatever the fuck you want to, as Kaylee says, if you feel beautiful, you are beautiful. Maybe that should be a goal of the year? Wear more of whatever the fuck I want! And you too? That’s a YES!